Can You (An Adult) Learn Emotional Intelligence
- Emotional Intelligence (EI) is highly important in a household as well as a business setting especially when dealing with people. Learn it. Love it. Fake it if you have to.
- Scientists aren’t sure yet whether EI can be a learned skill. But keep trying.
- EI is not a one size fits all type of thing. You either wield it often or you let it go deaf. If you would like to improve your dealings with other humans, however, I highly suggest you cultivate your brand of EI for the betterment of you and others around you. It can also open you up to how you can actually help the people in your life. SCORE!
There are more than a few posts out there on the subject of Emotional Intelligence (EI). The reason being is that it is likely one key factor to happy interpersonal relationships and success at work. There are varying definitions on EI which means that it can mean something different depending on the person. Overall the idea is that one can manage their emotions well respective to various life or work dilemmas. They find solutions calmly and adapt well under pressure. Most people like them as a matter of fact because an EI person makes others feel good. People that exhibit EI are well adjusted and empathetic to other people’s situations. They respond to people in stress with more listening and ask open ended questions to help assess the issue. The Insider provides 9 signs that bring you closer to your personal answer to, “Do I posses Emotional Intelligence?”. After reading that article, Well, DO YOU? If you’re on the fence as I suspect most people are, here is a great article to help you improve this particular useful life skill. The highlights are listed below:
- Reserve judgement on people. Examine things from other’s point of view. Find perspective and use it to dig out solutions that help everyone. It doesn’t help to lay blame constantly.
- Self evaluate as often as needed. Check in with yourself and your emotions in times of stress. What are your weaknesses? Be creative in addressing your truth. And take care not to judge yourself too harshly.
- Keep emotions under control. The likely answer is that there is not one person at fault in any given situation. “Be the change you want to see in the world”.
- Take responsibility – apologize if you’ve made a mistake or acted out inappropriately. You’re only human but that means you need to verbalize that.
One last note on emotional intelligence. Scientist currently are cautious on stating EI can be learned or improved. The reason why is that intelligence is viewed scientifically as a mental capability. The potential for improving EI is difficult to assess because recognizing, understanding and managing feelings is a toughie to test – as per this article from Scientific American. The loop hole is that ’emotional competence’ is something that CAN be learned, however, because it is the ability to learn about emotions and what the proper response to them should be. So yes, you can as an adult improve your social graces when at work and at home. But does that mean we are seeing the real you or something suggested by social norm. Let’s just say it’s the real you. 😀 Please be sure to check out the links. As I am no psychologist, just a curious bear.